Swaddle Me This

When I was a little baby, people at the hospital told my parents that it was very important to swaddle me up tight at night and during naps so I would sleep better.



The nurses were excellent swaddlers....

But my parents were not...

Every time I broke out, I startled myself awake!   My parents thought that maybe a velcro blanket would help...  (see that blur to the right?  That is my arm escaping at high speed!!!)

So my Auntie Nicole and Mommy's friend Kathleen each gave Mommy a Miracle Blanket.  That did the trick!

The miracle of this blanket is that it is not just a blanket -- it is also a baby straight jacket!  I couldn't escape even if I wanted to!!!

That is, I couldn't get out until I really really really wanted to.  And then, all of the sudden, I was able to wiggle wiggle wiggle....  Mommy and Daddy kept finding me in the middle of the night with the entire swaddle wrapped around my middle, and with my arms widely attacking little my face.  I let my parents know how much I hated sleeping unswaddled by screaming and flailing until they somehow reswaddled me. I decided that if I couldn't sleep, then NOBODY should sleep.



So Mommy wrote to Miracle Blanket Man and asked whether the blanket came in a bigger [stronger] size.  Miracle Blanket Man told Mommy I was just too big for the blanket and that she and Daddy needed to break me of this whole swaddle habit.

The question was HOW????? 

Miracle Blanket Man told my Mommy and Daddy to just take away the swaddle and let me cry.  He assured them it wouldn't be that bad.

So cry I did.  I screamed so loudly that Mommy and Daddy wanted to tear out their hair.  I kicked and thrashed around.  I was really really really ticked. 

For 75 seconds. 

And then this happened...

 Eh.  I never really liked that swaddle anyway...